Sunday driver
[Verse]
Well, I ve been a Sunday driver noo for many s a happy year,
I ve never had my Morris Minor oot o second gear.
I can drive at fifty miles an hour on motorway or track,
with me wife up front beside me and her mother in the back.
[Chorus]
There was me and my daddy and my daddy s mammy,
and her sister s Granny and four of her chums, and Auntie Jean.
[Verse]
In a crowd of fifty trippers you can always pick me oot,
by my âDon t blame me, I voted Toryâ sticker on the boot,
wi my bunch of heather stickin from my radiator grille,
and me stick-on transfer bullet holes and licence for tae kill.
[Chorus]
There was me and my daddy and my daddy s mammy,
and her sister s Granny and four of her chums, and Auntie Peg.
[Verse]
I ve a hundred plastic pennants just to show you where I ve been,
my steering wheel is clad in simulated leopard-skin.
Up front fae the drivin mirror hangs a plastic skeleton,
and in the back a dog wi eyes that flicker off and on !
[Chorus]
There was me and my daddy and my daddy s mammy,
and her sister s Granny and four of her chums, and Auntie Lee.
[Verse]
Well, I always drive as though my foot was restin on the brake,
I weave aboot the road just so s ye cannae overtake.
I can get ye sae frustrated that ye ll finish up in tears,
and the sound of blarin motor horns is music to my ears !
[Chorus]
There was me and my daddy and my daddy s mammy,
and her sister s Granny and four of her chums, and Auntie Liz.
[Verse]
Now, if ye wonder how these weekly trips I can afford,
it s because I m on a stipend from the Scottish Tourist Board.
You re supposed tae enjoy the scenery, the finest of it s kind,
and that is why I have a convoy followin behind !
[Chorus]
There was me and my daddy and my daddy s mammy,
and her sister s Granny and four of her chums, and Auntie Rose.
[Verse]
There s just no way of escaping me, no matter how ye seek,
for the simple fact that I m a traffic warden through the week.
I m boostin my efficiency, and here s my master plan :
I m savin up my pennies just to buy a Caravan.
[Chorus]
There was me and my daddy and my daddy s mammy,
and her sister s Granny and four of her chums, and Auntie Gertrude.
There was me and my daddy and my daddy s mammy,
and her sister s Granny and four of her chums, âYer gaun too fastâ.